Okay, so I am slow getting around to watching the shows on my DVR... Now that I have, well, I'm pissed off... I am, it's true. I'm just mad, and the frustrating thing is that I don't even know for sure why I am so angry. Good news is that I do know exactly where I want to lay the blame for it...on the television show The Bachelor.
Yes, I admit it... I am one of those girls that has watched this show for years...many years in fact. Since the days of Trista and Ryan, I have tuned in season after season to see the trials of reality tv love. For most of those years, I have cheered on the women that I thought were special and hoped that the right man would see how wonderful they were. I have doubted that you could really find true love with a million cameras all around you, but that has not stopped me from wishing them all well and hoping that for them, it could work.
I have to say that my attitude this season is not the best... I admit that Jake is not one of my favorite bachelors. I did not care for him when he was one of the crowd chasing after Jillian, and I can tell you that he has not really grown on me during his own season. Don't get me wrong... He may be the nicest, best manners, most perfect abs ever guy, but something about him doesn't sit right with me.
The course of this season has not helped. Hours before Jake is suppose to be proposing (and did) he actually took two rings from the jeweler because he could not figure out who he was proposing to. Are you kidding me? You don't think that if you can't choose, that maybe that is a sign that you shouldn't choose? Shouldn't you know by that point who it is you are meant to be with? They might both be great, but can you really, I mean REALLY be completely in love with both of these women? And, quite frankly, if I am these two women... When the tape rolls on this one, I am not sure I want to be the one he picked considering that he couldn't figure out who was meant for him.
So, the mad thing? Well it really just comes down to this... I want to believe (doesn't every girl) that a man could be completely consumed with how he feels about one woman... I want to believe that it exists, an amazing connection with a man that is emotional, physical, spiritual and strong enough to withstand all of the challenges in life. But I am afraid to believe it, because it seems that there is evidence to the contrary all around me (Jake included). If soul mates and finding "the one" are real possibilities there shouldn't be so much confusion. When the right one (the REAL right one) comes along you should just know, shouldn't you? However, my head tells me that what I want to believe in does not exist...the idea of it all is just a myth. I think the bottom line is that I am just mad that the rational part of me can't seem to be proven wrong.
I do know that technically none of this is Jake's fault... It is not like this is the first time I have considered this whole thing or been annoyed for not being able to figure it out. I just really would like evidence that my head is wrong and that there is a reason to believe in the myth. Because if the myth is just so much crap, where does that leave me exactly? How does that translate into expectations for future relationships? I am not sure. But thanks to The Bachelor my head seems to be right again...and it ticks me off. So, I am blaming all of my frustration on Jake...because I don't like him anyway and it just makes me feel (a little) better.
No comments:
Post a Comment